everything zen? i don't think so.

i just got an email from the allen campaign. they want me to post lots of stuff about lowell field calling george allen a monkey hater and committing a crime at raising kaine the likes of which haven't been seen since that one faithful night in byrd park during the allen administration. bashing lowell field is fine and dandy with me, because one lowell field once knocked on my door at 4am and tried to convert me to islam. i had my illegal immigrant housekeeper shoe him away, then i had the filthy winch deported. but not before i made her clean the toilets.

the allen campaign also wants me to link to jim riley's postings on lowell field. i originally had no problem doing that because i do whatever george allen tells me, short of definistration of the homeless, which i'll do without anyone telling me. please. i'm not some brown skinned hooligan who follows him around with a camera in an unprecedented attempt to harass him. i'm a civilized man. i was ready to serve mister allen.

then i happened across jim riley's vile cesspool of the homosexual agenda, virtual something. there, in this horrible place that richard gear's hampster dares not go, master riley promotes the homosexual agenda by displaying a tom davis banner (frog eating republican from northern virginia) and writing in a fruity manner about the perils of offending mexicans. somehow, these mexicans have riley's email address. why would they have his email address unless he worked part time scurrying illegals across the border in a wheel barrel that he rented from unitarians? i can think of no other reason.

besides, who cares about offending some illegal mexicans? when it comes to illegal mexican immigrants, i just thank god for the jumping bean, whose delightful prancing about distracts these sombrero wearing cretins long enough so that our children can usually escape from their grasp. though 1 in 10 children (1 in 9 minors) who come in contact with illegals end up being lured into joining the mexican army and attempting to retake the alamo.

the worst of it all is that i find out he works in the gravel industry, probably as a gravel arranger, making zen gardens. well i have news for you master riley. this is america. this is a christian nation, founded on the bedrock of christian principles, not the gravel of confucious.

george allen for president in 2008

i'm switching my endorsement for 2008 from sam brownback to george allen. he is a jeffersonian conservative. thomas jefferson sent lewis and clark across the country with an indian guide, pocahontis. george allen called an indian a shithead sand monkey.

you see? he truly embodies jeffersonian ideals.

should the government pay homosexuals to fornicate? i say no

this year delegate marshall and attorney general bob mcdonnell are promoting a special amendment that will make it illegal for the government to pay homosexuals to fornicate. i had no idea this was currently happening, but i'm very alarmed to learn from newsmax.com that it's been going on for some time now.

some liberals are spreading filth on the internet and claiming that this amendment legalizes wife beating. this is of course a lie concocted by beastiality enthusiasts who fear that this amendment will prevent them from receiving a hud grant for having a relations with their dog.

either way, wife beating is not a government issue, it's a family issue. it's an issue that the government should stay out of, because it's between a husband, his woman, and a priest (if he wants). the government has no business overruling a husband...unless he gets really unruly and knocks her unconscious a for couple of weeks straight (like into a coma) or keeps her in a cage for more than four hours per day. otherwise, these are family matters...and i'm not talking about the urkel show.

now excuse me i'm going install some really slippery stairs. hopefully my wife doesn't fall down them after this amendment passes, but you never know.

ken stolle, candidate for governor from lilly pad landing

ken stolle, the eastern bloc tax commissar from tidewater, poland, is running for governor in 2009.

voting for ken stolle in the republican primary would be almost as painful as donating blood to an illegal immigrant boy who was hit by an suv. he is a pro-gay, anti-embryo, pro-mexican, anti-child, anti-fetus, anti-sperm, anti-zygote, pro-tax (also known as pro-homosexual) "republican" who might as well leave his party. and if he's shopping for parties, he might as well hop scotch right past the democratic party and join the green party or the communist party...or retire from the senate and serve as president of human rights watch or the national association for the advancement of mason nudist camps.

tonight i will print out 1500 pages with ken stolle's biography on them and use them for timber, toilet paper, and lining for the cage of richard gear, my hampster. i am so outraged right now i think i'll mass email congress on capwiz 400 times warning them that the atf is flying so many planes over my house that my alf-alfa crops are dying from lack of sunlight.

ken stolle. please. his supporters are the types of people who want to allow blow up dolls to marry post-menopausal senior citizens.

no more meat markets

the homosexuals are selling their meat at a market. i was approached by several homosexuals in what they called a meat market. they sold me their meat and i took it by mistake. they are wily, and they tricked me, because they are wily. i sampled homosexual meat. i have eaten meat and i have enjoyed it. may god strike them down with a lightening bolt because they are demons and they are funded by the masons and the practice abortion with monkeys industry.

warning: shop at ukrops. avoid the homosexual meat markets.

i endorse harris miller for senate

harris miller will eat george allen.

homosexual tax increase banned

i heard the homosexual tax increase supported by the russians in the senate has been strangled by the icy hands of death.

this is good. but i will continue to chop down trees in the forest behind my house until i feel that our great commonwealth is safe from taxation, definistration of pastors during services, and mexican infiltration. the trees will feel pain, just as the hippies claim.